Being Thankful

This year's Christmas feel rather empty. Don't really feel like I'm having everyone I want near me.
Somehow I am always saying that I am so messed up, so screwed up. But, it has been a really long time since I sincerely appreciate what is around me all this while.

During this Christmas,
If I am given 3 things to thank for it will be:
1) The love, the encouragement, the kindness, the forgiveness that everyone gave me.
2) For being where I am right now, in a JC having the opportunity to move closer towards my dream.
3) Having such wonderful group of friends, that are always there whenever I needed the support, whenever I need someone to agree with me. Really love them for being there always.

Even though, sometimes i think too much, or distant myself away too much, I still appreciate everything. During this Christmas, I hope to share my love I feel for everyone this year round. Can never express how thankful I am.




There's so much things I am feeling that I can never express myself properly. I have no idea if its loneliness or inferior or self-consious or frustration. I hope there is someone who understand me better than myself. My darkside. Who knows what I do. What I have done. What bad things have I done that can never be recovered.All these are like my burden. I'm sounding like a depressed freak that needs therapy session.

During this holiday, I really have thought through alot. Get alot of time alone to think of what I have done.I should start the new year right. I just got to be who I really am. No social pressures.No pressure from everyone. Following my thoughts following my instinct and no one else. And I dont need any spouse or whatever that will share my feelings. Because I have friends that are way too much better. 2013. Its time for some serious work to be done. Lots of focus needed.